Pain
by Ecro Xineoph
Summary: As Shepard is recovering from her battle with Saren, she calls for Williams to help her through her pain, not realizing it might also help Williams with hers. Femslash, FemShep/Williams, One-shot.


_Pain_

**Beta:** AblatedCrayon

**Disclaimer:** BioWare owns Mass Effect and all related names. This fanfic is purely non-profit.

**A/N:** I guess technically this is a fanfic of a fanfic. The list of Shepard's injuries as well as her first name are taken from Elizabeth Carter's _Rising from the Ashes_. I claim no ownership of those ideas, just a thank you to Carter for the inspiration!

The turian C-Sec officer exited the lift, muttering under his breath about how slow it was, and made his way to the young marine performing maintenance checks on the ground team's weapons. "Chief Williams," Garrus said in his two-toned voice as he approached the gunnery chief. Ashley looked up from the HMWSR she was cleaning and Garrus continued. "Your comm link is deactivated. Shepard's been trying to page you."

"Oh," Ashley said with a guilty look at the switch for the ship wide intercom. It was in the off position, as it often was when she was working. Joker apparently thought it was amusing to turn on the comm and talk to random members of the crew whenever he got bored. Sometimes he even sung, if his caterwauling could be called singing. "Sorry. What did she want?"

"She's requesting to see you in her quarters," the turian replied.

With a puzzled look on her face, Ashley put down the sniper rifle. "All right, thanks," she said before making her way to the lift. After exiting the lift on the top deck, she walked past the mess hall with a brief, guilty look to where Alenko had often stood before continuing to the CO's quarters. She pressed the button just to the right of the door. "Ma'am?" she called through the door.

When she heard the commander's answer of "Come in, Chief," she proceeded through the sliding doors, standing at attention as she entered the room.

"Garrus said you wanted to see me, Ma'am?" Williams said, keeping her tone professional. Samantha Shepard was sitting on the edge of her bed with her elbows on her knees. She was breathing hard and slight perspiration clung to her forehead. She had obviously been struggling with something.

Ordinarily, the sight of humanity's first Spectre in such a distressed state, and for no apparent reason, would have been cause for alarm in the gunnery chief. However, a little over a week ago, the invincible image of the Spectre had been shattered by her brutal fight with Saren. Sam had defeated the rouge Spectre and his husk, but not without a handful of serious injuries.

After the fight, a fragment of Sovereign's hull had crashed into the Council gardens. With the last of her biotic reserves, the Spectre had pushed Ashley and Liara to safety and conjured only a weak biotic barrier to shield herself from the impact. She had barely managed to walk away from the crash. Ashley had managed to get her to the waiting medi-vac vehicle where Dr. Chakwas had been able to save Shepard after nothing short of six hours of surgery. The list of injuries had been extensive, including a deep laceration from the Spectre's right shoulder, across her chest and stomach, and down to her left hip, several broken and sprained ribs, a ruptured spleen, and a concussion, just to name a few.

For the last week, she had been laid up in the _Normandy's_ medical bay as per doctor's orders. Now that she was released, the Council wanted to see her to thank her in person for saving not only themselves but all of Citadel Space.

Ashley stood just inside the door for several seconds, noting that the commander's sleep top was partially removed so that her left arm and shoulder were naked while her right was being gingerly held against her chest.

"Thank you for coming, Chief. I'm afraid I need some help getting all suited up. I'm still just a little stiff."

Ashley stepped forward, approaching the now standing Spectre. "Not a problem, Ma'am." She hesitated a second before asking, "Skipper?"

Sam responded with a "Hm?" as she turned to face the younger marine.

"Why me? Why not Miss Prothean Expert?" The term, which had originally been used as an insult against the young asari crewmember, had long since turned into a term of endearment for the woman Ash knew held her skipper's heart.

Shepard flashed a warm if not lopsided grin. "Li's been buried in those Prothean data disks all morning, and besides, she deserves a break. She's been taking care of me for the past week and worrying her head off the whole time."

"Got it, Skipper," Ash said emphatically. In truth, she was more than happy to help, and the fact that Sam had called for her and not Liara caused a swell of pride within her as well as a tingling in her stomach. "Just tell me what you need."

With her left hand Shepard motioned to her shirt that still hung around her neck and right arm. "Well, first I need a hand getting this top off. Can you grab the bottom and pull it up over my head?" she asked as she turned so that she faced away from Ash. Sam wasn't wearing a bra beneath her sleep top and while the Spectre had no issue with showing her nude form, Ash could tell she was worried about offending the younger marine.

Ashley grabbed the bottom of the shirt and gently pulled it up, wincing inwardly at the multi-colored bruises that covered her skipper's torso. She continued to carefully draw the top up, pulling on the bottom hem of the shirt, causing it to turn inside-out as it passed over Sam's head. The Spectre raised her right arm to allow Ash to pull the shirt completely off and drew in a sharp, pained breath, her eyes snapping shut in pain.

"Skipper?" Ashley froze, not wanting to cause Sam further pain.

"No, no!" Sam said in a voice laced with pain. "Just pull it off, Ash." Quickly but with great care, Ashley pulled the top up the remaining length of the Spectre's arm, discarding the offending garment onto the floor. Sam's arm, now free of the shirt, retracted instinctively to her chest and was grasped by her left hand. Her eyes, although still shut tight, allowed tears to streak down her face; a few shudders escaped the slightly older marine as she struggled inwardly to conceal the pure pain that was shooting through her entire body.

"Skipper?" Ash took a step closer and, without thinking, placed a reassuring hand on her skipper's shoulder. "Sam? You alright?" She was flirting with insubordination by addressing the Spectre by her first name while on duty, but, at the moment, that was the furthest thought from her mind.

Another shudder raked the Spectre's body, and instinctively Sam leaned back into the body she knew was behind her. She turned slightly, resting her head on Ashley's chest, drawing strength from her fellow marine to finally dull the searing pain.

As Ashley felt Shepard lean against her she moved her hand from Shepard's shoulder to wrap around the still shaking form of her CO. "Sam?" she repeated in a whisper, her voice heavy with concern.

"I'm alright." the slightly older marine managed to say between ragged breaths. "Just…give me a minute."

The seconds crept by as Ash held her Spectre in a gentle but supportive embrace. Slowly, Shepard's breathing calmed and her shuddering ended. She felt warm and safe in the dark haired marine's arms. She moved her head from under Ash's chin so that she could look at the gunnery chief.

Their eyes met, warm brown eyes looking intently at blue ones, still red and wet. In that moment, a million words were unspoken yet a million feelings were conveyed. In the next moment, their lips crashed together in a passionate kiss that had been long denied. Ash's arms moved up and down the exposed back of her skipper. One of Sam's hands worked its way under Ash's bun to pull her head closer in while the other hand rapidly worked its way down Ash's back until it reached her firm ass.

The kiss lasted for several long, intoxicating seconds before Sam pulled away, placing her hands in front of her. Both women breathed deeply as they looked steadfastly at the floor. Their faces both shone red and both sets of eyes were dilated with lust.

An awkward silence hung in the air before Sam broke it. "I can't, Ash." Her voice cracked, but the resolve was there. "I love her."

Shepard's declaration crushed Ashley. She knew it was true. She had known for months now. But in the past few minutes, she had allowed herself to forget, and now the words stung as if she were hearing them for the first time. "I know," she whispered, forcing the words out before her voice could betray her pain.

"Ash, I —" Shepard tried to sooth the situation, but was cut off.

"Commander," the younger marine said, reverting to rank in an attempt to regain some level of normalcy. "Maybe I should go get Dr. T'Soni, Ma'am." If Ashley's use of rank hadn't displayed her unease, referring to Liara by 'Dr. T'Soni' certainly revealed just how much she had withdrawn behind the shield of the Alliance military.

Shepard looked up to see Ash standing at parade rest. The sight caused the Spectre more pain than she had just endured from her arm and shoulder. The same pain was mirrored in Ash's eyes, but no other aspect of the marine betrayed the ache she was feeling in her heart.

Finally Sam nodded. "Maybe that's best, Chief."

"Aye aye, Ma'am," Ash said as she saluted, then turned sharply and exited Shepard's quarters. Once the door slid closed Sam collapsed on her bed, head in her hands, silent tears rolling down her cheeks.

* * *

**A/N:** Well, my first serious fic, so any and all feedback is more than welcome! I'm currently not planning on a sequel, however that's not to say I'm opposed to the idea. ;)

This thing must have gone through about a million drafts to get to its current state. And for that, I must thank AblatedCrayon, the single most awesome beta in the world! He put up with draft after draft after draft and gave some of the best feedback I think I've ever recieved. So thank you SO much Crayon! You da man! 3


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